Dreams do come true

Guys, Guys, Guys! One of my dreams came true... I participated in a dance show... and got to see some inspiring choreography from the wings.

Work and play

It’s the second day of May, I only wrote once in April on this blog, so it’s time to make things right, and talk about… other things besides how tired I am and how much work I have, because that will get very boring very quickly.

I love the work, don’t get me wrong, but stage management (that’s what I’m doing these days) is… the unsung hero job of the theatre. In a full production, with more than 2 actors, costumes, sets and props, you really need a stage manager to be the eyes and ears of the team, and who can communicate any changes to anyone involved in any production area (cast, lighting, sound, video, set design, etc,) . But the stage manager, as the job requires, has to be discreet, almost invisible, and has to accommodate the team as much as possible while at the same time being a disciplinarian if need be. She/he works closely with the director, but has to respect the director’s vision, without necessarily giving contradicting opinions, unless what is suggested by the director is completely impossible to do. But then, a good stage manager should really think as creatively as possible to find a way to make what the director wants work. It’s a lesson in humility, basically. And I truly respect Touchstone’s resident stage manager, Emma Chong, for her grace and calm under pressure. She’s in the cast of The Pan Show, and that’s why I’m working her usual job. Fortunately, she gives me tips and suggestions to make the whole process as smooth as possible. It’s all about communication, baby. But communicating can be pretty darn exhausting sometimes.

That’s why tango is such a haven for me these days. Tango is also about communication, but in a more visceral sense, which shouldn’t involve much conscious thinking on the follower’s part (the lady). The Lehigh Valley tango society had its Spring Milonga a few weeks ago. A Milonga is a time for tango dancers to meet up and dance the night away. It’s different from a Practica, where you dance to learn and refine steps and techniques. The Milonga is the real thing: you’re on the dance floor, and anything goes. You and your partner just have to find a way to make it work. Our teacher had told us that we would, at one point or another, have a “tango moment” and thus become inevitably hooked. I already had a real appreciation for the dance, and enjoyed going to class every Wednesday, but my “tango moment” happened at the Bethlehem Milonga. Joaquin Canay, an Argentinean tango teacher who now lives and works in Syracuse NY invited me to dance. I was intimidated, since he’s a teacher and, obviously, very skilled. So the first dance really, well, it sucked. I wasn’t letting myself go, I was thinking every move, and just wasn’t in the moment. The song ended, he said ‘thank you’ – anytime one of the dancers says “thank you”, it signals the end of dancing together – and I went back to my seat to watch. But thankfully, he asked me later to dance again. And that time, I let go, I trusted his technique, and really tried to follow. Which, actually, was incredibly easy once I turned my brain off, since he’s such an incredible lead! And that’s when it happened – the tango moment, the great dance, the peaceful 15 minutes (for he didn’t say thank you after the first dance, I was doing something right!) – and now I will keep on dancing to collect more moments.

There’s something old-fashioned about the whole thing. The dressing-up, the class, the politeness, the ceremony. Structured, peaceful, pleasurable, necessary.

Fresh Voices

Fresh Voices is coming up... the apprentices' showcase. We're pretty ready, teching on Monday and opening on Friday (closing on Saturday). Official dress rehearsal on Thursday. Unofficial dress rehearsal - meaning, if we mess up we can start again - on Wednesday.

There are still a lot of things to tweak, to make better. I'm realizing to what extent we are lucky to be doing just exactly precisely what we are doing. Realizing that having a space to express ourselves is, truly, a blessing.

And that, well, it might not last forever. Touchstone, the apprenticeship, over in June!
What the **** am I going to do with myself then?

Just starting to think about this. Unclear, many perspectives and possibilites, but nothing pulling me towards one definite direction. I kind of like that. I kind of like that a lot. It's just a matter of not getting lost in the beauty of indecision.

So, for those of you who will not make it to Touchstone for Fresh Voices, if you would like to have a peak, here are a few pictures from my solo piece and the duo I'm doing with Zach. It's all a learning experience. And some of the stuff we're doing may be a bit obvious. But sometimes, it can be good to get rid of the obvious by expressing it. So, we're talking about a failed relationship. Me, girl, Zach, guy, what are we going to write a play about? A couple. Obvious. But, on the other hand, why not? Why deny ourselves the opportunity to write a piece about relationships?

In my solo piece, I'm talking about Alzheimer's. It has been written about a whole lot. I'm not going to bring anything particularly new to the debate, but hopefully something from my piece will be honest, and touching. I'm still working on that. Because Alzheimer's is a reality in my family's life, I find it hard to approach the subject candidly. But that's also why I chose to work on that theme. Fresh Voices is all about challenging ourselves. And I feel like we have been doing that. We'll see if the audience appreciates the effort...!

Photos from the solo piece Wanderings

Me as the puppeteer and Elena, the puppet representing an Alzheimer's patient.

Me as Elena's younger self and Elena the puppet as her older self.

Photos of the duo - we don't have a name for it yet...

Gus and Fiona in a Scottish pub. They are Celtic football fans, and were previously a couple. Still some unresolved issues there...

Gus and Fiona watching the match on tv, not so happy about what the players are doing:
"You could play some actual football instead of this pissin manky mandgy shite! You're not David Fuckin Beckham beating your nob on Rodeo Drive, you're a fuckin poster boy for Celtic! And if I catch you pulling this shite again, I'll set your mam on fire and make her shit hedgehogs!"

(excuse the langage, but they are Scottish hooligans after all. And the hedgehog line was apparently heard in a pub, for real!)

Gus and Fiona in a fantasy dance scene, involving a football and emotional intensity (what they can't express in the naturalist setting of the pub)


Gus and Fiona dancing - and Fiona (Anne, really) needs to look up at her partner instead of staring at her feet!! (note to self - stop doing that).



Zach about to do a hand stand on top of a soccer ball - Ah, choreography, you gotta love it!

About to be lifted up!

Encore du tango

D'abord, je m'excuse pour l'affreuse horrible faute de conjugaison que j'ai faite dans ma dernière entrée de blog. La faute a été corrigée, mais j'en ai encore un peu honte... je dirai juste qu'il faut que je révise le passé simple!

A part ça, voici une petite vidéo d'un tango sur la chanson de George Harrison While my guitar gently weeps. Pas de grands moments de passion à la Carmen, mais de la tendresse et de l'intimité. Et puis les pas! On a l'impression qu'ils glissent...

Tango!

Et Anne découvrit... le tango argentin.

Et Anne comprit enfin que la raison pour laquelle elle ne se tenait pas droite était parce qu'elle tassait toute la partie haute de son corps dans son bassin. Révélation d'un mercredi soir.

Avec la fin des boums, des soirées de lycée et des rocks dansés avec de bons amis, j'ai toujours cherché cette connexion, ce jeu de la danse à deux. J'ai trouvé un cours de danse impro/danse contact l'année dernière à Paris, et maintenant le tango argentin à Bethlehem.

Ce qui est bien avec la danse - et surtout la danse à plusieurs - c'est qu'on communique sans avoir à parler. On partage sans avoir à chercher des sujets communs. On vit ensemble, le temps d'une danse, d'un cours. C'est chouette!

Le tango argentin, tel qu'il est enseigné par ma prof, consiste davantage à sentir les mouvements de l'autre qu'à élaborer de somptueuses chorégraphies. Les trois minutes d'un tango sont trois minutes partagées entre deux personnes. Une conversation corporelle. Un même désir de légereté. Tendre vers l'immatériel, vers la connexion la plus précise et poignante.
Et la chanson s'arrête et on recommence, ou bien on sourit, on se salue, et on s'en va.

Fracture

Ceux qui me connaissent le savent: je réfléchis beaucoup. Le problème, c'est que mon cerveau finit par prendre le dessus en termes de créativité. Tout se passe là-haut, et peu se passe dans le reste du corps. Il y a une certaine déconnexion entre la tête et le reste. Je suis consciente de cette caractéristique, mais elle a été particulièrement mise en lumière lorsque j'ai executé un exercice de jeu devant un des acteurs du théâtre. Il s'agissait, pour cet exercice, de parcourir l'espace d'un point à un autre ; une fois en explorant l'espace sur un mode comique, et une fois sur un mode tragique. Il fallait explorer ce que ça voulait dire de marcher "comiquement" et "tragiquement" dans l'espace: se soucier de la ligne, du mouvement, de l'espace, de la texture, de la couleur, du rythme. Explorer toutes les facettes du mouvement, de la relation du corps avec le sol, avec le plafond, avec l'air. Exercice difficile.

Mon spectateur-professeur (Bill) n'a pas dit grand-chose sur ma marche tragique. Mais par contre, la marche comique! Elle était contrôlée par ma tête. Une marche droite, un seul rythme, quelques coupures mais peu de changements de tempo. Ce n'était pas, en soi, une marche ratée, mais je ne m'étais pas donnée le loisir d'explorer toutes les possibilités. Je n'ai fait que penser à cette marche, plutôt que de la ressentir, et de me laisser aller dans l'exploration.

Bill m'a donc dit de me concentrer sur la pensée instinctive, émotionnelle. Le truc c'est que je sais qu'elle existe en moi. Je me souviens, petite, que j'avais une compréhension physique des choses. Quand j'ai commencé à jouer au théâtre, vers 10 ans, je ne réfléchissais pas. Je faisais. Et puis, avec chaque année, l'action était chaque fois plus teintée par la reflexion, puis carrément remplacée par elle. Jusqu'au jour où j'ai finalement arrêté de jouer régulièrement. Et j'ai commencé plus sérieusement à écrire. Coincidence?

Zach et moi préparons maintenant notre spectacle. Touchstone permet tous les ans aux apprentis de travailler par eux-mêmes pour aboutir sur des créations originales présentées dans le théâtre pour deux soirées en fin février. On vient de commencer à travailler. Je ne sais pas encore ce qui va ressortir des répétitions, mais je sais que je vais tout faire pour rétablir un certain équilibre entre mon cerveau et mon corps en mouvement.

Danse mirage

Studio au bout d'une allée aux gros pavés séparés par des touffes d'herbe. Un de ces petits coins insoupçonnés, magiques. La porte entr'ouverte du studio donne sur une petite cour. On entend la grosse pluie frapper le sol. L'odeur rappellerait presque la campagne. Pas de bruit de moteur, même en sourdine. Chansons de ralliement des oiseaux alentours.

Et nous, on danse. Sol de bois et corps en fête. Improvisations en tous sens, chorégraphies faciles. Gens de tous gabarits, quatre hommes et un peu plus de filles. Tous différents, et bien contents. D'être là, dans ce petit coin retiré de la ville. Bien contents de danser, en attendant la nuit, dans l'éphémère mirage du Paris parfait.

My true feelings about U2 and hip hop dance

I listened to some of my favorite U2 albums today, and it had been a really long time since I hadn't indulged in that. My teenage self sang inside me, and my (barely) adult self too. Despite everything that is said about this band - and its lead singer - it will probably always be one of my favourites. And I think one of the reasons (besides all the memories and the fact that "with or without you" and "I still haven't found what I'm looking for" are engraved in my dna) is the optimism inherent in those songs. U2 songs tend to vocalise a strong attachment to life and what it has to offer. That's pretty unusual for a rock band! As Sasha Frere Jones says in her article on U2 coming tour in the New Yorker: "While almost every rock band flirts with the allure of destruction and the charm of sin, U2 has kept its eye on that corniest of feelings: uplift".
And, well, let's face it. I'm corny and I don't think I could survive without positive vibes.

I won't go to their concert because their latest album is not so exciting, the tickets are stupidly expensive, it's in a big stadium, and I've already seen them once live. However, that music is in me, and it's not coming out, so I might as well own up to the fact that I'll always be a U2 fan.
I would like to know though, does Bono do cocaine? Because if he does, his whole discourse on North and South and poverty and stuff would be completely discredited, and at the same time, I really am suspicious because he's so energetic!

I also went to see a hip hop show last night, and was not disappointed. The two dancers (twins) were talented, technically gifted and had this contagious love of performance that made them want to share the limelight with the audience. So at the end of the show, they invited audience members to come up on stage and to dance in a sort of jamming session. We're talking about a real professional show here, in a proper theatre. Those two guys did not want to trade the spontaneity of hip hop improvisation for an institutionalised showcase. And it was so refreshing to see a high quality show that also transmitted a spirit of celebration. The audience was extatic, composed of young, old, black and white people. For a parisian theatre, that in itself is a miracle.